A Tough Week

Wow, so, this was a really emotional week for me. It started off with a small thing of me trying to cook Bulgarian food during the weekend. Most of the time I just cook American food because I'm used to it and Peace Corps provided us with a great recipe book with recipes from previous volunteers that includes mostly American food. There's lots of good soups and casserol recipes in there. But I wanted to learn how to cook Bulgarian food for three reasons: 1) because it's part of the cultural experience 2) I like Bulgarian food and 3) so that I can host my coworkers over and serve food that they are used to and will like. Unfortunately I've never been able to successfully cook something Bulgarian. On Sunday I tried to cook sarmi and stuffed peppers, which I've eaten before and know that I like. I bought a whole head of cabbage to make them, and so I made a ton of sarmi, but they tasted awful. I ended up going out to eat every day this week because of it. I think this officially ends my attempts at cooking Bulgarian food.

Then, on Monday, a member of our staff left us. This was really sad, and now the dynamics in the office have changed a bit. Mostly this means that it's a lot quieter now because it's just Nelly and me during the day, and I don't talk much because I'm an introvert and because I still don't know the language that well. :-) (I like to blame everything on the language and the culture differences whether or not the blame is accurately placed there. It's a good coping strategy because it helps take the pressure off of me... and it's also often true.) The person who left was our youth leader and accountant, so now we're lacking a person to fill these two roles and we just won this big grant and there's so much work for all of us. Hopefully we'll find someone to replace her soon. Actually, we just had an interview with someone on Friday for the position, but I didn't understand what our final decision was or if we even made one. Talking about the language barrier segues nicely into my next frustration.

So, Nelly and I recently went to a big seminar that all volunteers in my group had to go to. The last day was just for volunteers and it was a language session day. I took the language proficeincy interview (LPI) during this time to see how my Bulgarian is progressing. I think I did all right... I found out on Monday that I received a score of intermediate-mid, which is one level higher than I was three months ago. However, I was receiving so much encouragement from everyone, and my lpi interviewer, after the test, said that I may be in the intermediate-high to advanced-low range, so I was beginning to hope for a little higher. But I'm content with my score. What I'm frustrated with is that I am so close to understanding conversations, but I'm still just not there yet. I understand the general idea most of the time, but just not exactly what they're saying. And when I ask for clarification I still don't get it because I still lack the vocabulary. I really want to get to the point where I can converse with people naturally. I think it's obtainable, but it's just going to take time.

I think the language frustration led to me being particularly homesick. On Wednesday, everyone in the office was working on a project together that was particularly difficult for them, and they were all super frustrated (they're applying for some type of license to work with at-risk-youth). But they were breaking the tension by making jokes out of their frustration and laughing to the point of crying (which then made me laugh). But it also frustrated me that I couldn't participate with them in it (due to the language barrier), and it reminded me of working with college friends on projects and doing similar things with them... and made me miss my American friends a ton.

So, on Wednesday it all got to me and I called mom through skype to complain and ask her to make it all better the way mothers do. So we talked for a good long while and she sent me a ton of good recipes for normal American food that I can make with ingredients that can be found in Bulgaria (thanks mom! :-)

Then, on Thursday, I had a really good day. I went to a tutor session and it went super well. We went over something I had written for my Bulgarian blog (I'm starting a blog in Bulgarian about American culture for some kids at a local school) and I was impressed with how well I did. I've had writing assignments before, and there was a large and obvious improvement from my last assignment to this one. Later on Thursday, we had a meeting with the volunteers and someone from a local organisation about a competition they were inviting us to participate in. And then we all made martinitsi, which are essentially bracelets made out of white and red yarn, sort of like friendship bracelets. Everyone uses them as part of a spring celebration (I'm not quite sure how they're used yet). We're making them to sell as a sort of fundraiser I think. I'm not sure what the funds will go to. But, the point is, I had a good time making martinitsi with the volunteers and listening to them banter. And then, on Friday, Sonya and Nelly came with us to the dancing lesson, and it was sooo much fun! I love dancing the horo!

So it's not always easy here, but then, it's not always easy in America either. Sometimes it seems there's so much different between the two countries, but I'm still always amazed at the similarities too. Everyone has their good and bad days. People find ways to laugh to make things easier. Kids like to be loud and girls like to make bracelets out of yarn while the boys like to sit back and watch. And, of course, everyone likes to dance!